The excitement and anticipation coursed through my vessels as I felt the adrenaline. I picked you up and carried you to the bedroom so we could be in peace. I undressed you slowly and methodically. I wanted to remember every part of you as you unveiled yourself to me.
I don’t know why I didn’t do it before. Maybe I was embarrassed to admit how much control I’d given you… But I was so desperate, I called someone I knew who was sober. He told me I didn’t have to fight you alone. I spent years trying to leave you, but I never succeeded for more than a few days or weeks at a time.
Share Your Love
Finally, there’s the use, or relapse. Your goodbye letter can come in handy in the future. When things get tough in goodbye letter to alcohol your recovery process, you can read the letter to remind yourself why you decided to get sober in the first place.
- Describe the person in your own words that relate to how you view them — both before and after addiction — as well as what your relationship means.
- More and more we are seeing tributes to those who have lost their lives to overdoses.
- I cleaned my apartment and redecorated to remove all traces of you from my life.
I would be lying if I didn’t say we felt powerless around him. We spent immeasurable time trying to find a way to support you. It hurts so bad to remember the countless hours we spent worrying about you. Even with our best efforts, we soon realized we were helping our addict, not our son; he was already gone. As a person who has never struggled with drug or alcohol addiction, I can only speak from that perspective.
An Open Letter to My Addiction
In fact, I was in debt because of you. I spent time in prison because of you. Sure, there were times when I missed you when I felt weak or bored without you, but I was happy.
- It doesn’t discriminate based on class, ethnicity, gender or sexual orientation.
- In the meantime, I remain hopeful that one day you’ll win your battle against substance abuse.
- When you stumble, it is tempting to just give up.
- You see, I am so much more than just another person risking their life through drug abuse, and I will not be a statistic.
- Your old life must die, and there is tremendous pain with that death.
Too often during recovery, individuals yearn to completely forget the past. Moving on is important, but living a life of fulfillment requires forgiving oneself for the past. The guilt of rock bottom can be crippling, but so can the denial of former transgressions. Although your reason for avoiding it is the very essence of a specious denial, AA is not the only venue through which to confront your drinking.
Ask Amy: Yes, I drink too much, but here’s why I won’t do AA
If it were easy to quit, everybody would and I wouldn’t be in this apartment, listening to the temptation, writing this piece that’s as much for me as for my readers. I don’t know how many times I’ve quit before. She earned a doctoral degree in clinical psychology from Alliant International University (CSPP). Her current research focuses on family issues, teen behavioral issues, teen substance abuse, mental health, and relationships. Join our newsletter to be part of a community of people with shared experiences.
The effect you had on me was instantaneous. Like pouring gasoline on fire, we mixed, but it was dangerous. Euphoria pouring all over my body as I lay there nodding off, I pushed you off me and said goodbye for the evening. I thought that was going to be the only time but your magnetic pull had other plans.